Music Store Free Paintings Portfolio

Sunday, July 31, 2011

A Late Night Landing

i underestimated how quickly i could fly a helicopter in. that's why i'm late posting today.

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Cool Playlist

his favorite artist is Vanilla Ice with Coldplay in a close second and Ice-T after that. he's listening to Foreigner's "Cold as Ice" right now. Madonna's "Frozen" is up next followed by Metallica's "Trapped Under The Ice". ok i'll stop there.

Friday, July 29, 2011

My New Music Needed a New Outfit

i just finished the new album cover and web design for The Power Hour Album. the new music is soon to follow the new look!

Everything I Can Think of Already Exists

we have bikes and unicycles. why not motorunicycles? ok, well i just googled it and i take that back. there are a bunch of different versions of what i described. though they're called monocycles.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

More Adorable Means More Hazardous

a scary looking gun comes with a built in warning that it will hurt you. this cute gun is much more deadly because it fools you into thinking it's innocuous. that has got to be the reason why no real guns look like nerf pistols or super soakers. imagine if this was able to kill someone.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Dahfudel, Dafodill, Daihfadil

daffodil looks like it's spelled incorrectly. though i don't know how i'd spell it to make it look correct.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Monday, July 25, 2011

Maybe the OAR Was Supposed to Be the Band

CANOE is an acronym for the "big five" personality traits. conscientiousness, agreeableness, neuroticism, openness and extraversion. though i'm pretty sure this person was asking for a small narrow boat which was much easier to paint.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

English Is His Second Language Behind Chirp

he meant to write "peace" but he reads and writes at a bird grade level.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Good Thing He's Not Swimming in Nam Pla

the fish doesn't have to worry. siamese cats only eat thai food.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Don't End Your Band Name With a Preposition

this isn't an angry bird. it's from a band called The Boy Least Likely To. i mean, he may still be angry but he's not stolen from that game. he's stolen from a musical group. a musical group that has bad grammar.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Won't Be Painting on a Lake

it's time for my third annual trip to california to rent a houseboat with my friends. i'll be back next week to resume my land activity of creating one square foot of fine art a day.

Have a Symbol for a Pet

this request was for a non-traditional yin yang. it always kind of looked like two fish to me anyway. i want to train a couple fish to do this in real life.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

False Advertising

wikipedia says: "A jiffy is defined as the time taken for light to travel some specified distance. In astrophysics and quantum physics a jiffy is the time it takes for light to travel one fermi, which is the size of a nucleon. One fermi is 10−15 m, so a jiffy is about 3 × 10−24 seconds." i've never made any jiffy pop but i assume it's blindingly fast to do. or someone needs to write ConAgra Foods a strongly worded letter.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Free Isn't Cheap Enough

well this is a first. i painted a person's cat per his request. then i sent a photo of the painting to that person saying the painting was done and i would like to mail it to him for free. his response:

oh my!!
that's a surprise!!
i had forgotten about this
and i've since found a local artist who did Carrie's portrait.
so, i'll pass as i have only a little room to hang things...
thanks though!!

but 1400 requests???
good for you.
keep having fun!!

maybe i should start paying people to take my art.

also, i find it interesting that he gave each sentence it's own line break. actually, one of the sentences is even split up over two lines. it's like poetry for the new millennium.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Stacking Liquid

i find the concept of liquid contained by right angles humorous. it just seems really unnatural/convenient. like most things going on in the world today. yet i'm all for it. unscrew a top? please. and what about wine? how the heck am i going to stack and store all these bottles? plus they're so heavy and i can't just fold up the glass to dispose when i'm done. and when i drop one? catastrophe. pouring beverages from a bladder is genius whether or not it sounds less than appealing.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

And I Want to Pick Mine Out of a Tank

i found out that koi are just common carp. they're cool looking, domesticated versions of carp but they're still just carp. i want to find a restaurant with koi on the menu.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Thursday, July 7, 2011

The Most Gamey of All The Mooses

mmmm moose sounds delicious. the meat or the dessert. not the hair product though.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Watch the Crazy Cats 8:30 ET / 7:30 CT

no photo reference for these guys. just the description "One of them is long and lanky, one is average size but a bit round, and the third is smaller than average, the runt of the litter." sounds like a setup for a tv show.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Hand Tree, How Are You Still Alive?

this requester wanted my interpretation of his sketch. i made it a caucasian hand tree but i'm now thinking i should have made it green because this thing should be getting energy from photosynthesis instead of melanoma from burns in the sun.

Monday, July 4, 2011

I Put Forth This Dragon Art

here is my fourth dragon. he's a dragon on the fourth of july and he's also the fourth one i've painted.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Infinite Configurations

this was another generic robot request. i keep changing their looks. it's been a long time since i did one based on my original design. how many robots does it take for ali to run out of ideas?

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Friday, July 1, 2011

The Subject Is Worth More Than the Art

do you think lobsters like that they're an expensive food? i can't decide if i'd want to be delicious or terrible if i ever got eaten. clearly it's one or the other but i don't know which one.