Music Store Free Paintings Portfolio

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Amphibian Mammal Love Is Love

How does the animal world feel about interspecies couples? Was this guy a pioneer?

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Finding a Cooler Habitat

This is a tribble, an alien from Star Trek, riding a polar bear. I'm assuming this situation happens after humans destroy the planet enough that polar bears decide to travel out to space.

Monday, September 28, 2015

Art Makes Things Happen

This never happened in the movie. It happened in the requester's head. Now it's happening on canvas.

Sunday, September 27, 2015

This Painting Is False Club Merchandise

This is the logo for the Liverpool Football Club. They tried to trademark the image to stop false club merchandise but the bird has been used to represent the whole city of Liverpool since the Medieval era. It was decided that "The Liver bird belongs to all the people of Liverpool and not one company or organization". Sounds like another story I heard.

Saturday, September 26, 2015

History Repeating?

Elon Musk wants to colonize Mars. That makes him the modern-day Christopher Columbus, right? But there aren't any Native Marsicans we're intruding upon, right? Also, how do we celebrate Space Thanksgiving?

Friday, September 25, 2015

Thursday, September 24, 2015

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Apparently I Don't Know My Own Hand Strength

It's funny that I talked about using an unconventional color for a subject yesterday because that's what happened with today's painting, too. Yesterday I almost said "animal" or "character" but I changed it to "subject" because, well, sometimes it's a camera.

Creative or Cheap

Sometimes I use an unconventional color for a subject because I accidentally squirted too much of said color out of the paint tube. This is one of those times.

Monday, September 21, 2015

Everyone Just Builds Fences Alone

Ok, so then what do you call someone who builds fences? How does a person who needs a fence built find a professional to help with that service? This sport has absolutely ruined SEO for the fence-building industry.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

They Serve Peanuts at This Open Mic

Elephants generally prefer to sing with a mic stand because then they can also trumpet from their trunks. I'm assuming this guy is doing standup since he's holding the mic like that.

Friday, September 18, 2015

Some Predators Actually Take Them as Pets

I'm pretty sure the Dik-dik's main form of self defense is being so freakin' adorable that nothing would dare eat it.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

< Nerd > < /Nerd >

HyperText Markup Language! There are tons of these guys on the page that you're looking at but you don't see them because programming magic.

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

No Big Gulps for This Big Guy

No stegosaurus has ever successfully entered a 7-Eleven because no stegosaurus has been ever able to put on the required garment for their "No shirt. No service." policy.

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

A Threesday Post... Er... I mean, Tuesday.

I wrote you a poem about this post:

I missed two days in a row!
Oh no!
So here you go!...

This is just a guard dog to make sure the other two stay in line.

Ok, this is a pretty cool coincidence that makes me actually glad that I was lax and ended up posting these paintings together. Because this is a vampire cat...

... and this is Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Friday, September 11, 2015

The Baby Is Pointing to the Robots

Two today because forgetful yesterday.

It's a small world after all. Or a large baby after all.

I love that Disney wrote a gender-stereotype-bending love story. Wall-E was the male and EVE was the female but they have characteristics that don't necessarily go along with that. EVE has a better job than Wall-E and seems more intelligent. She's also more distant, powerful and less emotive. Plus she's got weapons. By the end she needs to be saved by Wall-E, making him the stereotypical strong male character. But hey, it's a step in the right direction. Especially for such a big company like this that has such a huge influence on culture.

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Please Go Look at a Real Sunset Instead

Ok maybe this isn't a very good approximation of the subject I was asked to capture. Sorry, requester. This art is free and also I'm not as good of a painter as God.

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Monday, September 7, 2015

This Caption Is Sung

This is what I have to say about Star Wars:

Sunday, September 6, 2015

A Painting of Symbolic Teaching Aids

When the requester described this, it seemed like it was conceptual and he had an underlying symbolic vision in mind. Looking at it finished, maybe he's just a science teacher and this is a sampling of the stuff in his classroom.

Saturday, September 5, 2015

Chopped and Screwed

If you dumped out the Kool-Aid guy, filled him with Sprite, poured in prescription-strength cough syrup and threw in a Jolly Rancher, this is what you would get. Sizzurp. It doesn't sound like the healthiest of beverages. I feel like the original trademark owners probably wouldn't be happy about this appropriation of their brand. OH YEAHHHH!

Friday, September 4, 2015

Yorkies Have the Opposite

It looks like he's angry but that's only because his bushy eyebrows are misleading. All Scottie dogs and Schnauzers have Resting B*tch Face.

Thursday, September 3, 2015

A Couple of Non-Human Things with Human Qualities

Ah! forgot to post yesterday. Please let me make it up to you with two :)

He already lives seven years for our one. Screw being healthy. He might as well have fun with the time he's got.

Pizza is delicious enough that even if it had a personality and we held a conversation together, I'd still eat it.

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

The Weapon Says Conservative but the Scarf Says Liberal

This is OSU's mascot, "Pistol Pete". I'm guessing he got his name because "Gun Control Pete" just doesn't have the same ring to it.